Monday, August 16, 2021

In Celebration of Bryan the Shopping Guy. Okay, Kohl's. You Know I Only Come with 30% Off. But Really? You Send me a 40% Coupon. Boom!

I've confessed numerous times, "I'm the world's cheapest human being." I used to do it out of thrift, but now I do it out of the game, and the ridiculousness of it all. My life began in retail (selling women's shoes, so I got the whole retail thing). Me? Nope. Give me Clearance racks at 80% then send me 40% off coupons. I'm there. And I will ransack you if I can.

The humidity finally broke, and I woke up, drank coffee, did my Sunday a.m. reading ritual and fell back to sleep until 1 p.m. because I knew Pam was excited Kohl's sent me a 40% off discount. Usually, I only go with 30%, but they must know I haven't been there for a while, and wanted to lure me in. 

I did manage to grill for the week: chicken, Hoffman hotdogs, and CNY salt potatoes (thanks, Cynderballz), but my real highlight from Sunday was my 35-minutes at Kohl's. I told Pam, "You go. You are like a Tasmanian devil when you shop, and I'm like a 90-year old man who just had his testicles removed. I will not be fast."

Sure enough, when we met up, I had too many items than I could carry and she only had a sundress. She decided she didn't want it, and ended up carrying all my things (which I was thankful for - I was in pain). Long story short, I got a comforter, new sheets, new wall art, new book ends, and new photo frames all for $80, saving $486.99 from original prices (of course that is marked up, but when you pay $22 for a $260.00 comforter, you get excited). 

I also got a photograph sent to me from Ms. Beverly of Milford, as several months ago I purchased (full price - I spend when I love my friends) some Dragon Fly art from Indonesia --- carved and painted by hand. They were beautiful and I knew I needed to get them for her. She sent me a photo last night and I was thrilled. They look great. 

I really do like my bird book ends, too, from $78.00 to $24 with a 80% discount and then my 40%. I'm definitely using them in my office. And I'm thrilled for Beverly that the dragonflies match her house and look as good as they do. 

Wusah. 

But, I can tell you that 35-minutes of shopping did me in. I'm cooked.

Also, special shout out to Beth Boquet for my Italian ice. It's specialty made. I can't wait to try it. I sure do love spending any time I can with her. But now it's another Monday. This time last week, I was unconscious and being cut open. Today, I still have ice in my crotch, but my crotchety attitude is getting better...so that's good.

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