Here You Go, Universe. I'm Back to the Grind. And This is My Truth. Higher Education Has Me Perplexed. I'm Thinking About It.

When I was a K-12 teacher, I had several years where things were fluid, learning occurred, and pure joy came from hallways, seats, sporting events, and classrooms. Then, there was a shift in leadership - "I know better than you....you just don't understand...the District is moving in a different direction...We are requiring you to do it this way."

Students weren't heard. Teachers weren't heard. Learning became robotic. Joy disappeared. To be honest...it just sucked.

I cannot understand why people don't listen to the world around them...pay attention...see what works...find the ingredients to move the team along and prosper. Rather, as all the expertise and knowledge is heading in one way and working, they want to pull it in the other direction that is counter-intuitive to what is best for the majority.

I'm a team player. What do you need me to do, coach? How can I help in the kitchen, ma? How can I make this easier for all of us, class? 

Perhaps that is why when I try to warn people, to share openly and honestly, only to protect others and myself, I feel bad. I don't see how people don't see. It boggles my brain. Then, when they continue to push they know more, and better, I can't help but resist. I just want to leave.

This might be why the National Writing Project has always appealed to me...teacher leadership through teachers teaching teachers...it became my religion. You want teacher leaders? Then listen to teachers. Let teachers reflect on their practice with one another, and dream what's possible for tomorrow. The same is in the classroom. Kids are awesome when you listen to them. Leadership comes from being an ear, thinking, proposing, chiseling, and acting. It's a constant cycle of questioning, doubting, adjusting, tweaking, and imagining. The measurement comes from numbers, yes, but also joy. Are the people happy? Who are your worker bees? Who brings up morale? What is the buzz on the streets?

I guess I'm wondering, "Why do anything if not to find happiness? A better world? Hope?" 

I'm getting too old for bullshit. I always say, "Actions speak louder than words," but here I am using words to help guide how I should act. In 2016, I acted. I went forward and earned a Ph.D. I chose the pathway to happiness...to finding out better ways to bring joy to those around me. I've found that joy (and I'm lucky) within a National Writing Project family. What works? It works.

Welcome back to work, Crandall. Hiding out in your head with the love of kids, literacy, and success was the luxury of sabbatical. Now, it's back to watching what my colleague used to call the U.S.S. Shit Show. I know it's a round hole, but I WILL get this square peg through. I see this round hole, but I KNOW this star will go through. 

And you watch and you watch the tongue hanging to the side of the mouth while trying to offer advice, "This is probably not going to work, but maybe you might..." 

Oh, never mind. 

Gary Larson depicted it best....a sketch to summarize, not only K-12 schools, but institutes of higher education.  The older I get, the more I realize it's not necessarily the kids, nor the educators, nor the custodians, nor the staff...

...it's the systems, and the administrators of those systems. They are the one that create schools for the "gifted," without paying any attention to what they actually got inside.

Ah, it is what it is. This too shall pass.