So, Yesterday Sort-of Stunk...Began with a Skunk, My Mind Went Defunct, so I Went to Bed Feeling Bodunk.

And in the category of being most like Jerry Lewis, but wanting to be Brad Pitt, the winner goes to...

Dr. Bryan Ripley Crandall.

This is where the muppets come out and cheer, confetti is flown, and Kanyea West arrives to the Mic and says there's no way I deserve it. The award really should go to Paul Reubens.

So, I had three days this week where I was up at 5:30 and online by 7. As a result, I went to bed early and was able to fall right to sleep. Wednesday night, however (it was a warm night, so slept with the windows open), I heard Glamis whining at my door, so I awoke to let her in. When I opened the door there was an acrid smell, but I figured it was Edem's cooking. He does that while we sleep, as he works overnight. I immediately jumped back to bed and kept thinking, "Oh, someone must have hit a skunk outside."

I woke up the next morning and thought it was gone, and came downstairs to look to the street to see if I could find a black and white rodent squashed to the pavement. No death, though. It wasn't until Glamis came downstairs that I realized it was her. She was hit. Quick.  Apparently, Edem let her out after I went to bed and let her back in. He said he smelled skunk, too, but figured it was just outside. Actually, he said it was permeating the house, but he didn't realize it was the dog.

Um, of course it was. The culprit was lying in my bed.

Now, this is bad, but it is nowhere near the episode when Baby was hit in Cicero. That skunk seriously foamed her and when she came inside, she looked like she took a bubblebath. It was that gross and she made our small house smell like skunk for almost two years (The Nottingham Bulldogs will remember the days I walked the hallway simply saying, "Yeah. That's me. I smell like skunk." It was on everything I own).

So, I scored high school portfolios for 3 hours and then ran to get Skunk B Gone at a local pet store, so I could return home to go after the smell. Glamis can be a miserable wretch in the bathtub and today was one of those days. As I was scrubbing her, she whaled like I was skinning her alive (I will leave that whaled because it was an Orca like sound). Then I put her outside and scored for another 3 hours.

When we finished portfolios, I went for a walk with Glamis so she could get more of the stench into the fresh air. It wasn't until the evening, when I went to pay for a special Sue McV birthday dinner at Eatz Vietnam Louisville that I realized my wallet was missing. An hour of tearing up my house looking for it (I'm a creature of habit. My wallet is always in the same spaces, just like my keys and, now, just like my masks. My glasses tend to disappear more often), I realized it wasn't here. 

Long story short...

My wallet was found in the parking lot and they held it. I couldn't believe it had the same cash and cards - as that has not been my experience in the past. Usually the cash is cleaned out and only your cards are returned (don't ask. Road trips between Kentucky and Syracuse). 

Ugh. Well, today I have the MLK Youth Leadership Academy and I'm excited to be featuring Becoming Muhammad Ali by Kwame Alexander and James Patterson. I am also very, very thankful that the kids won't be able to smell me. 

Nature. Of all superpowers, you had to give skunks that one? Phew. It's too much.  It's just gross.